“Success depending on how you starts out”
Copyright © 2008 by J.A.Mcbean. Library of Congress Washington.D.C.20559
INTRODUCTION.
O ne of the reasons why people get lost, and are left stranded, on our vast high way yearly. Is because they did not take a map, and do a study of the route they should have taken, before they left home. Without proper information, you bound to lost your way in the storm of life.
You might inquire on the purpose of this book. I have done extensive research on failed relationships and concluded that marriages could be saved if the engaging parties received training before they entered into that sacred arena.
A Marriage is a life long investment, it is not cheep either, one ring, one wedding gown, entertainment of guests, all this can mount up in the thousands, and leave a couple indebt even before they start out. Five years after my marriage, we were still paying bills that we did not even know about.
This book fills in for the pastors with little or no time. It is a teaching manual. I have done a few books based on marriages. I have discovered that many people who get married did not get any premarital council, nor do any snap course on the subject before they got married. Due to this lack of information, their lives are tangled up.
Men and women do not understand each other like how they profess. For example a woman is concerned on how cute she looks, while the man is more concern on her attitude and her availability. One cannot live with people if you do not understand them. In addition, to understand people, you have to draw upon someone else experience.
When people saw somebody that they think they are in love with, it is important that they bear in mind that what they are looking at is the person’s physical appearances. The person’s characters, attitudes, concept, upbringing, hurts, and mind set are not reveals in their physical appearances. All of what you expect from that good looking body might not be available to you is anyone. It also makes good sense not to get your hopes up when dealing with people.
MAKE SURE IT IS YOUR SIZE.
One thing you do not want, it is something that is too tight for you. A relationship that strangulate you, can squeeze the pulp out of you, you need breathing space. If you wait to step in the mess by yourself before you believe that mess is lying by the roadside, you will step in a lot of mess. For example, many African-American women get married to Jamaican men and have a successful marriage, at the same time equal amount have bad experiences. The reasons for the bad experience are that these women did not do a study on the Jamaican culture. You need to know about the culture the man is coming from. In America, Black women take the leading role because long time down the road they are quicker to get employment than the men, and he who carry the purse rule the home. In Jamaica, the men take the leading role, because the man work and support the wife and children.
The Jamaican man walks in front while his wife walks behind or beside him. He is the head of his family and any day he finds out that he is not the head he will leave. If you do not agree with the culture do not bother to marry to the men, it is not going to work. This is just an example.
THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM.
Real bad problems seldom arise before the marriage begins; if it does, it is a rare case. It is after the marriage that all the bad habits are going to show its ugly head. What was cute and funny during the courtship and engagement period, the same thing is dumb and stupid during the marriage. You might never hear your intended spouse pass a gas, nor pig out around the dinner table. However, wait until the marriage all the "lady-ism" and the "gentleman-ism" is thrown through the windows along with the under wears.
This book is a counseling manual for those who are planning to get married. I will assume that you already have an occupation in place or are learning one.
I also want to assume that you have read many of my books about marriages. I also want to assume that you are not scared of Bible verses, because we will be using them. Before you consider getting married, have your own happiness before you get married. Have your own self esteem. Do not come looking to get these from another person. Dump out the baggage from the previous bad relationship. Get healing for that emotional cut. Burry the dead dog, and burn the dead cat, but do not bring them over.
THINGS THAT BREAK UP MARRIAGES.
The reason for this book is to point out some of the things that break up marriages. If you are driving from Florida to Georgia and you were told that somebody is going to ambush you at the border of Florida and Georgia, you would make some adjustment to your travel. Either by changing the time of traveling, or by changing your vehicle, changing route, or postponing your visit to Georgia all together. However, you will have to do something, even a monkey would take up decisive actions.
The relationship falls apart because the couple did not cement the relationship. The marriage bond made their relationship legal between God and man. However, then we need to bear in mind that external forces can break up a marriage.
Matthew 19:5 (NASB-U) in addition, said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? Matthew 19:6 (NASB-U) "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together let no man separate."
Therefore, the couple must have certain principles, establishes between them both, to stabilize the relationship. For example, you have to have a game plan how you two are going to deal with hear-says, because it is going to come. Many a marriage broken up at the work place lunch room, base on hear-says.
This book is to point out the marital ambushes along the way. One of the first culprits in downing a marriage is
“Power struggle”
Power struggle between wife and husband can leave a marriage tied up for thirty years until the marriage finally evaporates. Some couples could buy a house a long time ago but cannot come to any agreement on what kind of house to buy and where to buy the house. The power struggle among them hinders them from coming to any agreement.
Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?
YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THE DEAD FISH AND ITS PAST BEHIND.
The smart thing to do is to agree on who have emergency power in the new relationship. Which one of us two is the head of this new family? If you two cannot agree on that it does not make any sense to go any further together.
"Hear says”
hear says, and the Interference of family and friends, can poison a marriage for ages. This is another marriage killer. Painful childhood upbringing, like sexual abuses can causes a woman to be bitter and her husband never know what is bothering her, always thinking that he is the one making her unhappy.
“Money trouble”
You know what they say when money stop rolling it is the head that rolls. You will have to think about the monetary side of a relationship, and have plans for it even before you two moving in together.
It is important to know that each party is responsible for their mate sexual fulfillment; you cannot just ignore it or wish it away. You cannot push it aside and use it like a jukebox, whenever you have personal need and when you have the time. That is not how it works in God’s law. You have to think about your mate need and make adjustment for it. Some people do not think what they are getting into; they do things according to feelings.
1 Cor. 7:1-5 (NASB) Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. [2] But because of immoralities, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. [3] Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. [4] The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. [5] Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again lest Satan tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
1 Cor. 7:1-5 (KJV) Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. [2] Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. [3] Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. [4] The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also, the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. [5] Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
“Look phobia”
is a symbol of insecurity. One mate is scared of who the other mate is looking at and scared of whom is looking at their mate. This look phobia problem can imprison the life and freedom of the other mate. Every body look at other people, the only difference is that women and men do it differently. Women use their peripheral vision or positioned themselves to have the man in line of vision, and then give him a good look over, while men turn their heads and look, but we all look. We should not let our feelings get hurt only because a spouse is looking. We should try to find out what about that person that cause he she to be looking and see if we could adopt that thing.
Disagreement
is another problem that will arise. How do we deal with disagreement? How do we deal with grievance? The massage of this book is that the two people get together and talk about these problems long before they become a problem. Killing the bugs before they stay around the stink the place up. The fact that we are people, and have different upbringing, different likeness, and dislikes, lays the ground work for disagreements to spring up.
AGE COMPATIBILITY.
Abraham was ten years older that his wife. When the man and a the woman is on the same age, you cannot ask that woman to be subjective to that man. A girl is much more mature and advance than a boy of same age. This is like putting a man who does not have a high school diploma, to be the supervisor of a man that has a Master’s degree. Age mean a lot, also as women age, their sex drive tend to go off line, incomparable with men. This might be offensive to some women, but if happiness is what you are shopping for you had better take age into account. Even though, this is not true in all cases. Because some old woman can keep a young boy up all night.
Genesis 17:17 (KJV) Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall a child be born unto him that is an hundred years old? in addition, shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
1 Peter 3:5-7 (KJV) For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: [6] Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. [7] Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
HAVE A GAME PLAN IN PLACE.
Therefore, the smart things to do is to have a game plan in place that will illustrate how we are going to deal with disagreements and all the other problems when they arises.
IN GENERAL.
The churches should give courses to their members who are coming into maturity for marriage, long before they even find a mate. Courses in money handling, working, banking, shopping, cooking, and child raring. The churches should have work shops, where people learn to do basic needle works. Because all this will come in handy in the years to come. People need training and how to develop problem handling skills.
RELATIONSHIP.
It is said that eighty five percent of a person success depends on other people. Maintaining a good relationship with others is as vital as the air we breathe. You have to know human nature, understand their grudges and their greed. Understand them and be sensitive to their needs and feelings. Even when you do, you are going to get into trouble with people, then suppose you did not know? A relationship is a shared life. Once you entered into a relationship with somebody, you have shared your life with him or her. You cannot go off on your own and contract any business without the knowledge and consent of your spouse. Why not? Because it involves your spouse.
If my wife misses her car payment, the company calls me. If she is late with her credit card, payment the company calls me. It involves me. Not her father nor sisters. If you cannot make adjustment in your life for a spouse, do not seek a spouse because it will not work.
BEWARE OF TUMBLE BUGS.
As a boy growing up in Jamaica. I remember seen a certain kind of black bugs we called "tumble bugs". Every time you see them, they have a ball of dung before them pushing. These reminded me of certain kind of in-laws. The wife's family who dig up dung and plant hard feeling in their female relatives. These relatives "plant hard feelings" by making jokes drop a word here and drop a word there. They also make an indirect suggestion and break the peace of the family. If they are slighting your spouse, it is something they are trying to tell you indirectly. Get rid of him, or you cannot be a part of us. However, you are not a part of them, wait until the man is fed up and quit, and you will see who is with you. Then they have you working in their back yard. Washing up their pots and pans. Tumble bugs never stop dig. People who were digging under my marriage, twenty years later they are still digging. If you should put a tap on the telephone conversation coming from those in-laws, your belly would have drop out. Every hard feeling that people plant in your mind you must examine its source, and ask yourself if it is justified.
If you do not does this Satan can use people to plant ill-feelings and doubts in your spirit. In addition, by doing so, they bring a quick end to your marriage. A woman friend of mine went overseas and got married. Her relative know of the man womanizing yet they did not inform her. Even when she came down to married to the man, they stood there and watch her getting married to the man and did not warn her. She returns to the state and send for the man, and they still did not tell her of his behavior. The man came up and she is happy. Now the relative began to tell her of the man past behaviors. Why wait until now? Listen to your own hearts; do not make friends and relative plant ill-feelings in you. Do not make them use your head to break up your own life.
MARRYING INTERRACIALLY
We have an article on our web sites that, Title “How to married INTERRACIALLY and have success” If you plan to marry out of your race. It is important to know that you have to make adjustment in your own life for that. Certain Family and friend might have to be left out. You might need to change town, are do not live too close to people that might not agree with your decision. Interracial marriage stands a great chance of success if the two people research each other background, and make adjustment for prejudice family. If it is nice across the fence, then you must be prepared to stay across the fence. For example, a black and white couple, might not fit in a black community nor in a white community, you need to keep close to other interracially couples. This is where you bound to find acceptance. Do not try to make others understand, just get on with your life.
BEWARE OF PEOPLE WHO ARE POSSESSED WITH FAMILIAR SPIRITS
Leviticus 19:31 Regard not them that have familiar spirits, neither seek after wizards, to be defiled by them: I am the Lord your God.
Familiar spirit is very friendly evil spirits. You will swear to God that this is one of the nicest person there is, but wait until you move in with them. A person being poses with this spirit can fool almost any Christians, especially Christians in charismatic circles.
THIS PERSON IS A CONTROL FREAKS.
This person cannot change and cannot take rejections. Some of them give their mate an ultimatum” You have to kill me, but you are not leaving me” Any where you move to the person always turn up, sitting down outside in their car, watching your house. Some of them use the police to find you. Eventually you might have to just blow him away. This is why you will need the spirit of God to show you what you are jumping into.
John 16:13 (NASB) "But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come.
DO NOT SEEK SAME SEX COUNCILORS.
It is best to use counselor of the upper-sex. Because women tend to side with women and men tend to side with men, When your marriage is about to hit the rock, there is no time for stupid and one-sided counselors.
Sirach 42:13. For just as moths come from garments, so harm to women comes from women “The New American Bible, Saint Joseph Edition.”
Women do not make good women counselors, for women. They tend to take side, and sometime side taking is not going to help your marriage. You need somebody who will help you find a way to make it work. One woman post a massage on the web site. Her Jamaican husband of ten years marriage wants too much sex. The truth is if he still wants her after ten years of marriage, then he really think well of her.
Sirach 6:7. When you gain a friend, first test him, and are not too ready to trust him. Sirach 6:8 For one sort of friend is a friend when it suits him, but he will not be with you in time of distress. The New American Bible, Saint Joseph Edition.”
Never speak about your spouse to your friends, and if they start a conversation along that line, get up and leave. They are trying to worm their way under your skins.
PRE-MARITAL CONTRACT:
If you love me and trust me why a contract? Trust must be earned; you get my love now you must earn my trust.
In the world of business, it is not what you deserve you get, but what you negotiate for. The same way that a country has to have some kind of constitution, or written document on how that country should be run. It is the same way that the new family or new relationship, will need to have something, or some principles by which the new relationship is going to operate by.
If you are coming into the relationship intend to get and not to give you will need to have that in pre-marital agreement.
The good thing about a premarital agreement is that it makes each party aware of what they are getting into. If you want to keep your go-go dancing professions, you will need to have it in the premarital contract. You also need to put a clause in it that you do not want your mate to come watch any of your show. You will have to shake your stuff in people’s face to get your good tips, and you do not want him or her standing there like a head dog over you. If you drink your beer, you will need to have it in the pre-marital contract. If you are a counselor, and have to keep your counseling in confidentiality. You do not want to relate people problems to your mate; you will need to have that in the contract. You do not want an eavesdropping mate, who keep peeking and poking like a mosquito.
DO NOT FORGET MEDICAL RECORD AND BACKGROUND CHECK.
You are going to be sleeping with this person you are moving in with, I would want to assumed. Do you know what disease he she might have? One of my patients is dying from HIV, the man she married to gave it to her. She was a virgin when he married her. After bringing her home the same night he gave her the HIV. If a person refuses to voluntary exchange medical record and police record before getting married, that person has something hiding. If they ask you for trust. Yes! I trust you with belt upon your backside.
MIX-RACE MARRIAGE.
“You cannot eat your cake and have it” From the beginning of time there was all ways interracial marriage. Nothing is wrong with that. However, tell that to the couples prejudice relative and friends. If you married to a white person, you have gone white. You are white. If you married to a black person, you have gone black. You are black. Make your mind up before you cross the racial fence. There is going to be a split between you and some of your relative. Can you live with that? The split will not be forever, if you stand up to them and abandon them for your spouse, they will return to you after about eight years, when they saw you both still going on together.
You cannot have their favour, and have your spouse at the same time if they disapprove of your decision. Some parents invest thousands of dollars in their children and feel insulted when that child married contrary to the parents will.
Some family have a thing called “The family secret” Where they want each other and are upset with new comers. Do not push your face where it is not wanted. It does not make sense that you get your face rub in mud. Do not make stupid decisions, then blame it on the lord when you find your life tangle up. Some Christians make me laugh. I was driving down the road with one of my brother in law, he was driving very hard, and I asked him why? He replied that it is the Lord that is driving his car so I must not worry. I told him to take away the car from the Lord and drive it himself, because the Lord is driving too rough. Do not act stupid then blame it on the Lord.
One of the reasons why Eastern marriages seem to work, and there are but few divorce, it is the women relative from both sides that chooses the bride. Since they are the one that do the choosing, they do not want to be the ones to do the breaking up. Therefore, they try to promote the marriage instead of tearing it down.
MONTHS BEFORE THE MARRIAGE.
Introduce your intended spouse to your family. Ask their blessing. Any member that refuse to give you their blessing, move away and stay away from that family member. Because that person is going to stir up trouble, dig under and dig over. Drop a word here and drop a word there, until they bring about the breaking up of your marriage. If my reader is a man, beware how you push yourself into a group of sisters and cousins who are competing for the same man. Nothing good will ever come out of it.
LEAVE YOURSELF AN OUT.
Some people cannot change not even if their life depends on it. In addition, they are not honest, they will know that their life is like a broken down car and come to you with it.
One man came into one of our church, and married off himself to one of our strongest black woman, twenty-eight years old, while knowing that he is impotent.
Another woman, married to certain man. The person would never go to work; he left all the bills on her. Finally, she dumps him. He keep coming back begging to be given one more chance, as soon as she let him back in within two months he is right back to his own self again. She dumps him one last time. He came to her house one morning, they argue, she went into her car, before she move off, she do not know where he went so quickly. She came out of the car to look around, she found him lying down on the ground crossway her car. He prefers to be killed ending his life and her life before making one change.
IF THE RELATIONSHIP GOES BAD, CAN I LEAVE WITHOUT WE HAVE TO KILL EACH OTHER.
You need to ask these questions, and get an answer before moving in with any body. Tricksters will try to say you do not trust them, but trust is always earned. Trust must be earned and not came from love. One does not need to earn love but trust must be earned. You must prove yourself before I leave you with my ten year old daughter. You will need to know if you can leave, if things go bad, and avoid blood shed.
LEAVE ROOM FOR RECONCILIATIONS
Leave room for reconciliations. During a quarrel or a misunderstanding, do not say and do too much that when the misunderstanding clear up, you two cannot get back together. Some people say and do so much that when the truth came out, they cannot even face the accused party and beg forgiveness. Do not act and hear says.
Let us face the fact, no matter how much education we had on a subject we can go out there and made the worst mistakes of our life that causes us dearly. Only Jesus Christ can help us with our decision-making.
Proverbs 3:6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
WE must begin, continue, and end every work, purpose, and plan with God. Self-sufficiency and self-confidence have been the ruin of mankind ever since the fall. Man's sin has been to live independently of God. True religion consists of full acknowledgement of God in all human affairs (Proverbs 3:5).
SOMETIME ONLY JESUS CAN HELP US:
Matthew 6:33-AV But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Isaiah 55:6-AV Seek ye the LORD while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near: Isaiah 55:7-AV Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
LOOK AT THE BENEFITS OF BECOMING A CHRISTIAN:
How does a person become a Christian, and are sure that he/she is save? First the person must know that he/she is a sinner and need deliverance from the lord.
Romans 3:23 (KJV) for all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;
Galatians 3:22 (KJV) But the scripture hath concluded all under sin, that the promise by faith of Jesus Christ might be given to them that believe.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT THERE IS A GOD:
Hebrews 11:6 NKJV But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT GOD IS READY TO FORGIVE HIM:
Isaiah 55:7 (KJV)Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the Lord, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
THE SINNER MUST BELIEVE THAT CHRIST DIED FOR HIM:
Romans 5:6 (KJV) For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
Romans 5:8 (KJV)But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
1 Cor. 15:3-8 (KJV) For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; [4] And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures: [5] And that he was seen of Cephas, then of the twelve: [6] After that, he was seen of above five hundred brethren at once; of whom the greater part remain unto this present, but some are fallen asleep. [7] After that, he was seen of James; then of all the apostles. [8] And last of all he was seen of me also, as of one born out of due time.
MUST BELIEVE THAT GOD CAN KEEP HIM:
Ephes. 3:20 (KJV) Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Jude 1:24 (KJV) Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,
PERFECTING THE SAINTS IS A WORK OF GOD:
1 Peter 5:10 (KJV) But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen, settle you.
THE SINNER MUST KNOW THAT ONLY JESUS CAN SAVE THEM:
Acts 4:12 (KJV) Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.
THE SINNER MUST MAKE A DECISION TODAY:
Isaiah 1:18 (KJV) Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.
2 Cor. 6:2 (KJV) (For he saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.)
BOW YOUR HEAD AND PRAY THIS PRAYER:
Lord I am a sinner and need your salvation. Forgive all my sins. I accept your son Jesus as my savior today.
We can sing with the song writer" I rise walk in heaven’s own light above the world and sin with heart made pure and garments white, and Christ en-throned with in. The cleansing stream I see I see I plunge, and O It cleans-eth me. O praise the Lord, it cleans-eth me, it cleans-eth me yes, cleans-eth me."
DROP ALL PRE-CONCEIVE IDEAS OF CHRISTIANITY:
Drop all preconceived ideas of Christianity because these conflict with the reality of Christianity. The lord will live the life through you day by day. You do not drop things from your life on your own. The spirit of God will walk you out of sins in his own time.
FIRST HUMBLING YOU:
Ephes. 2:8-9 (KJV)For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: [9] Not of works, lest any man should boast.
If you stop sins and get holy before God’s timing you will begin to boast how it is your own magnetism got you so far, then you became a source of discouragement to others. Therefore, you are going to stuck upon a sin or two. The sin always getting the better of you. This will push you to always accept God’s grace, and to see your own frailness.
1 John 1:8 (KJV) If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
TO CONTINUE GROWING IN GOD:
1 Peter 2:2 (KJV) As newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby:
2 Peter 1:5-10 (NKJV) But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, 6 to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, 7 to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. 8 For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 For he who lacks these things is shortsighted, even to blindness, and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins. 10 Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble.
FINDING OUT YOUR CALLING:
When I was newly save, the believers always, ask me if I know the will of God for my life! I never really know what they were talking about. Every person that was saved had a mission and a gift. However, because you are just a babe in Christ you do not know any of these. As you go on with the lord his will for you will unfolds day bay day. Do not run off and make any big commitment. Your mate has to be tailor made for you by God. You are now a citizen of heaven. Heaven does not rule by democracy. You cannot serve God with democratic mind set.
WHAT YOU MUST DROP OFF:
Hebrews 12:1 (Living Bible) Since we have such a huge crowd of men of faith watching us from the grandstands, let us strip off anything that slows us down or holds us back, and especially those sins that wrap themselves so tightly around our feet and trip us up; and let us run with patience the particular race that God has set before us.
Ephes. 4:31 (Living Bible) Stop being mean, bad-tempered, and angry. Quarreling, harsh words, and dislike of others should have no place in your lives.
Col. 3:8 (Living Bible) but now is the time to cast off and throw away all these rotten garments of anger, hatred, cursing, and dirty language.
GET A GOOD BIBLE, AND FIND A GOOD CHURCH:
One of the best Bibles out there is the New King James Version. Dake’s annotated Bible is very good. Next, you need a living bible to make some thing simple.
Hebrews 10:25 (Living Bible) Let us not neglect our church meetings, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other, especially now that the day of his coming back again is drawing near.
PROTECTING YOURSELF FROM BEING SPOILED BY MAN:
Col. 2:8 (KJV)Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
Hebrews 13:9 (KJV) Be not carried about with divers and strange doctrines. For it is a good thing that the heart be established with grace; not with meats, which have not profited them that have been occupied therein.
Seven Ways that People Can Spoil Christians:
1. Through philosophy (Col. 2:8)
2. Through vain deceit (Col. 2:4,8,18-19)
3. Through human traditions (Col. 2:8)
4. Through human religion and world principles contrary to the gospel (Col. 2:8,14-23; note, §Galatians 4:3)
5. Through circumcision (Col. 2:11-13; Acts 15:1; Romans 4:9-16; Galatians 5:1-11)
6. Through the law of Moses, demanding observance of the laws on meats, drinks, holy days, new moons, feasts, and sabbaths (Col. 2:14-17)
7. Through cults that puff up and imitate the gospel (Col. 2:18-23)
By all these means, unsuspecting souls are being carried off as plunder and booty by false teachers. The founders of false religions and human philosophies which pamper the flesh and give their victims elated feelings of importance make an appeal to them.
Christianity is loaded down with some false concept. Some little believe system, which are spread by false believers. One of such teaching is that you must “Look like Christians” How does Christians look? Genuine Christianity is not an external thing but of the heart and spirit.
Micah 6:8 (KJV)He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?
When cults capture a newly converted Christians, the cult first job on that new believer is to close their mind. Preventing the new believer from reading any material from other churches. So that new believer will never get out of their trap.
YOUR HORMONE DOES NOT STOP WORKING WITH CHRISTIANITY:
Philip. 3:20-21 (KJV)For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ: [21] Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself.
Romans 8:23 (KJV) And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.
Our bodies were not save at conversion. The work of redemption took place in your spirit man. Our body will be redeemed at the return of our lord. We are still waiting for the redemption of our body.
According to Philip 3:20-21 and Romans 8:23. You are still going to have urges. You have to present your body to the lord as a living sacrifice. Not dead one. Living sacrifice give trouble, you will have trouble keeping that body tied to the altar. However, as you and I grow in the lord what seem impossible will be quite possible.
Come back for update soon.
"Sword Bearer"
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